My God will not be outdone in generosity.
He asks for my obedience, He does not demand it. He waits, He never imposes Himself or His will on mine. The more I am obedient the more I am blessed. This isn't the kind of arrangement I tried to make with God when I was a teenager, "God please give me ____ and I'll give you ____."
I feel a lot like the Grinch. I actually think my heart has grown exponentially. I didn't have the capacity for this kind of love, obedience or patience just 12 short months ago. I lacked discipline in several areas of my life and though I continue to work in all these areas, the change inside of me feels so amazing.
This might well be the happiest time in my life. There are stresses, worries and troubles, oh, I SO promise there are. There always will be, I cannot sacrifice my life to the work of the enemy and the garbage he throws at me. That is just stuff. None of it is eternal. Surrender it, embrace it, learn from it and move the heck on. This kind of happiness is more satisfying than any temporal happiness. This isn't fleeting. It doesn't shift with the weather or the season, my cycle or moods. This is the joy of walking in obedience. this is the joy of knowing that I am immortal the work being done in me is God's work. wow. Wouldn't we all be honored to have some famous designer from HGTV decorate our house, do our landscaping, or sit on the couch (off camera) with Dr. Phil and find out how to fix your family? We'd be the envy of our neighbors. But God is the architect of our hearts, our lives if we let Him. The only thing keeping us from the BIG REVEAL is the bus of our stubborn will. Move that bus!
God's blessings are able to reach me because my disobedience is not constantly getting in my own way. I am called to be perfect like my Father in heaven is perfect. This is my journey. For so long, I knew this but gave myself the slack to fall and fail. I will fall and fail, but I refuse to give myself permission to do it. I will forgive myself when I do, but allowing myself to do anything I know I should not... how is that a net gain for me? answer: it's not.
Ever start out on a goal? You get so excited and encouraged when you see progress. I can see the progress of God's work in my life, and on my very heart. The failures are even blessings as my will surrenders to His.
We are moved. Well we still have the wood playset at the other place, but we are, aside from that, moved. I love our new place. It's perfect. I hope to post some photos tomorrow and now that things are settling in return to blogging. We live across the street from the parish where I work, St. Mary's, as the youth minister now. I love everything about our location, our home, our town.
So much more to share but there is also laundry and meatballs that need tending. I pray you will move your butt, I mean BUS and see what God wants to reveal to you.