I know plenty of ppl would get up on their soap box to argue with me but this is my blog and my opinion, aka MY soap box so get downI have something to say. Being a full time, stay at home, homeschooling mom is the hardest job in the world. Period.
It's the hardest because anyone with a any career outside the home has a better chance of holding on to their identity than someone who spends their entire life within the walls of their home, and with their children. When your life is about the care and really the service to your family, there is less and less time for you. Less time to pursue your passions, interests, hobbies, exercise, (shower) and to just continue to be you. There is less of you and more of everyone else. You give everything you have to your kids, your home, your husband, and at the end of the day the tank is truly empty.
Moms don't get to have their feelings hurt, we can't be sick, we can't be irritable or short tempered, we can't lose patience, heart or hope. We have to be a brilliant, creative, loving, kind, all-knowing force all day, everyday... FOREVER.
I could list all the jobs moms have to accomplish but really I am just too tired! I have to return a friend from a sleepover, make a grocery list, get the kids ready for Mass, and decide what craft materials I need for a Santa's workshop I am hosting. After I lunch I'll be working on world peace.
I do everything in my home. I am the CEO. I know we moms like to say things that, domestic goddess, etc. But I don't say that tongue in cheek. This family is a corporation. We have assets, liabilities, we have a product, we have resources for which we are stewards. We have a central operating office, we have board members, employees, and contractors, which all must be managed. I don't know of too many other CEO's who have to clean the toilets in their buidling and stock the break room with nutrious snacks. All the while with two black labs under their feet, the phones (yes 2-3 cells and a house) and little children whose minds and hears are blank slates waiting to be written on. NO pressure.
There is a monotony that happens when you are in the home raising and schooling your children that doesn't find a counterpart in the workforce. Even at an assembly line job you see that you are turning out products. You may be doing the same thing but the visualization that something is completed because of your efforts is a tiny reward. For moms the reward will not show itself for many, many years.
I wash the same clothes, towels, dishes, and floors every single day. I clear the countertops a dozen times a day. I cook 3 meals a day nearly everyday. I have been on my own since I was 17, and mom for 16 yrs. That means I have prepared 17088 meals since my first child was born. Okay yes we eat out some. If I take off 10% that is still 15380 meals. Not to mention the lunches I send with hubby that are different than what we are eating. Or the 3 different lunches I make for my kids some days because one only wants to eat from the orange food group (cheetos, cheese, mac and cheese), one has decided she is a vegetarian, and the other bats clean up eating whatever they don't finish and then some.
Yeah it's the hardest job but then I have never been known for doing things the easiest way. Somedays I hate the work. Somedays I am lonely. Most days I am tired physically, and emotionally. But somehow every morning I am bathed in grace. His mercies are new everyday. Christ gives me the strength, the heart, the coffee, to get through another day-not just survive it but to live it.
When the days are the hardest I try to smile at my kids more. I try to hug them, kiss their foreheads and tell them I love them more. I listen for their laughter. The times when they play together quietly and nicely. I decide on those hard days that we will have a big lunch and sit at the dining room table with real dishes (instead of paper plates) and we will eat and talk and visit together. Sometimes I'll get out the nice wine glasses down (and liquor them up-just kidding!) and we have apple juice at lunch and say cheers and toast each other. I try to find some way to get back to the whole point, the purpose, the "why" of it all. It's right there in their bright eyes. In their potential for sainthood, love, joy, and life. It's worth the sacrifice.